Reminders about Marriage...

This morning I drove up with Heredes to Cooper City. It's a day of meetings, planning, and doing homework. As he is down stairs in a meeting, I was looking up some devotionals about marriage. Can you believe it! It will be 3 years of marriage on December 27. So far, marriage has been great. I am so blessed- I've been given such a great gift, my husband. I take that for granted to much I think. I take alot of things for granted. Sucks! As we all know, marriage is filled with good times, but sometimes those nasty, ugly little times show up. It is those bad times that I believe so many people give up on their marriages and end it with that ugly D- word. (divorce) I never want to even think about getting a divorce or even having that word come out of my mouth.

As our marriage grows, sometimes it can be tough. I'm not going to lie, I am such an emotional person that sometimes I let the stupid things pile up rather than having fun with my best and only half- HEREDES. Every month women, we get a little friend that passes by and ruins 4--6 days out of that month. I find myself so weak during that time..and i mean weak in every area of my life. Spiritually, physically, & emotionally. I think the only good thing that happens during this time is the fact that I can't stand seeing the house dirty, so I start to clean. :)

So, this morning I wanted to read a bit about what God has to say about marriage, feelings, and commitments through His word and some devotionals. First, I read my friend HP's devo. about how in the beginning GOD created everything and that TODAY (& everyday) I need to lift His glory up and not mine. Then I jumped into James McDonald's devo. about "...walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness." Galatians 5:16,22: meaning- Marcy, stop getting angry and bitter about stupid, small stuff and walk in the Spirit and let His fruits flourish within you.

Next, I stopped by www.crosswalk.com and read a devo. about kids and parents (holy cow, that is another level that I am not even ready for), The next two devos. are the marriage ones and the first one is titled: Three Attitudes Needed in a Successful Marriage. The three attitudes are: trust, appreciation, and acceptance of differences. I sit here and think, Lord, I trust my husband. And when I say that I trust him...I really trust him. "Baby, I trust you." To my friends who are newly weds or are about to wed, trust your husband's and tell them that you trust them and encourage them in their most weakest moments. If I am an emotional freak, then that tells me that my husband struggles with something too. So, be sensitive to his needs and reaffirm him constantly.

Appreciation and acceptance of differences are areas I need to work on. I hope I am an appreciating wife. "Heredes- from the bottom of my heart, I want to say thank youuuu so much for washing the dishes yesterday. It means alot and I am so thankful. :)" The auther writes, be honest & sincere in you appreciation. Lastly, it's funny how "we" say that our husbands/wives are our better halves, but so many times we want to change them or wish they weren't the way they were. I'm guilty of that. So, I go back to HP's devo. about God creating each one of us so differently and uniquely; all creation is like that. So what right do I have to want to change my husband. Of course, there are always areas that need improvement, but I think we understand what the author is trying to say here.

The last devo. I want to share (bc this is getting to long) is titled "Building Marital Securtiy while Living in a Culture of Divorce". This is a conversation between the author and his wife. Something that really hit me was the question "How do you build security in 'our' marraige?" She answers by acknowldeging that she would never say the words hate, divorce, or leave, even if she thought them. ;) And second, (and I remember my mom always telling me this) is her vows were not only said to her husband, but they were a true commitment before the Lord. And that my friends is what I find so amazing. How true is that!!! My commitment the night of our wedding before the whole congregation, was for my husband, but above all to my Heavenly Father. She reminded me that "feelings will change so many times during the day because situations change- but my decison to love him was a commiment for life". A solid foundation in Christ will produce a solid foundation in the HaM relationship. LOL. I remember the song by Geoff Moore and the Distance: "Right here, right now, in the midst of the crowd...I stand alone and make my vow. Whatever it takes I will be faithful. Right here, right now, Let there be no doubt. Let every whisper, with every shout, Let the whole world know I will be faithful. This is my vow." (Oldskool, but great and so true)

These were all great reminders to just keep at it. Fight the good fight. Honor God, Remember I am not even close to being perfect or knowing it all. And that as a wife, I have a responsibilty, duty and service of commitment to my loving husband and my AWESOME, forgiving, merciful Father. My encouragment to all the women who are late in years in their marraiges, in the middle, are new, are about to get married, or are single and one day it will happen....keep those attidudes fresh in our brains: trust, appreciation, and acceptance of differences and remember your commitments. (not only in marriage, but in everything) I was having a weak weekend, but thank you Lord for pushing me to get out of my lazy, dull feelings and getting up and reading your word and thoughts to encourage me today in my relationships- especially my relationship with my husband.