Learning to truly trust Him...

Yesterday, I was talking to my friend Katrina R.. She is a special woman in my life. There aren't many who fill up my list of women who truly mean something to me. I don't know if that is a bad thing or a good thing, but I do know that those few women that set an example for me, mean the world to me. Katrina was my youth pastors wife. His name was/is Joshua Jefferson. To some of us who are in ministry today have very grateful hearts for his life and ministry while here on earth. You see, my youth pastor, softball coach, & leader passed away 3 years ago- August 4, 2004.

I can remember the day so clearly when we found out the news. I was at summer camp with my old church. The pastor called a few of us in to the lunch area- it had to be like 10 of us- and he told us that Joshua had just passed away. At first, it didn't click that it was my youth pastor, I thought it was another Joshua. When it sank in, I couldn't believe it. I ran, with my husband & friend Tati, outside to call Katrina. And after our short conversation, I remember going back in the lunch area, hugging my sister and Heredes and just crying. Oh, as I write this I am in tears, though I know he is in Heaven and having the time of his life! Amen!!! (He battled with a sickness since a youth & passed away at the age of 27. Katrina you can correct me on that.)

Katrina is a woman with a story- a beautiful story- that God has written and is still writing. God has blessed her with a new husband, that I have only met once, but know he is incredible. Katrina- THANK YOU! I love you with all my heart. I just want to scream it out!!!

You must be wondering why I am writing about this. Well, yesterday I found out that an ex- co-worker from Christ Fellowship Academy (I worked there like a year ago) passed away on Monday due to stomach cancer. I really didn't know her, but I do remember praying for her and seeing her face around campus. Also, FRC lost a dear member, but Heaven gained another soul. I remember my friends, the Riling's, who lost their husband and daddy to cancer not too long ago. Katrina's friend, who is 15, is also fighting a disease and taking medication and visiting doctors, etc. My friend Jescel, has just gotten back from her home country- the Philipines- visiting her ill mother and father, who are both fighting cancer. Check out her blog. She is an incredible woman, who will inspire you.

I don't know, but right now I'm thinking that this is a pretty sad post. I have yet to encounter such difficulties in my life and sometimes I think, Lord, if that day ever comes or when it comes, please help me be strong and hold on to You. I'm a weakling and I don't want to be.

I read this incredible devotional yesterday by Beth Moore. The title is "Songs in the Night"- Job 35:10; Acts 16:25-31. As a summary to the story in Acts, Paul and Silas are put in prison for casting a demon out (in the name of the Lord) of a young girl, because she was prophesying & being used as business. While in prison, after being beaten and locked away, they are praying and praising God. One night, the prison walls fell and the warden for sure thought that all the prisoners escaped. Just about to commit suicide, Paul yells and affirms him that everyone is inside; no one has left. Because of this, Paul and Silas' song & example, the warden asks what he must do to be saved. The end result: his whole household and himself accept Christ as Savior.

Here is Beth's conclusion: "When we sing a midnight song or speak praises in the darkest hours, the chains of hopelessness not only drop from our ankles but sometimes from the ankles of those who listen. The message is never clearer than when God's people refuse to cease their praises during intense suffering."

In the midst of every pain, every loss, every unanswered question, God is real, God is great! There is power in prayer and song. There is power in a life lived by praise. I am learning that- slowly but learning. I know that those I have mentioned above, have or are doing that. If you are not, can I encourage you to start today.

I share this for all of you, especially those who are going through the storm that will just make you stronger, and for me, a weakling who needs to hold on to this truth and live it out.

As I conclude, may you be blessed and remember to live a life of praise no matter what the circumstance. And if you can you please pray with me for: Peru that just got hit by a 7.9 earthquake. Things are looking okay, but just pray that nothing will arise during the night. For our campus, my family, and those who lost family members.

Also, for my husband as he goes tomorrow morning to court for his immigration situation. We are trusting God.

"Thank you God for your goodness, mercy and forgiveness. Thank you because You are a great God! I thank you for the good and the bad that comes our way. Thank you because suffering produces: perseverence, character, and hope. Thank you for those I know who have already gone through some suffering and yet, have been such an example of true faith and trust- in the midst of the pain and confusion. Thank you that Your will is perfect and I and all of us can trust that. Be with those today who are hurting, have questions, and are Yours. For those who don't know You, may they turn to You and not away from You. Give them the strength that they need & the song that will bless Your Name. In your powerful name Jesus, Amen."